Why I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

So I have mentioned before about me having what's called BPD (borderline personality disorder) basically means I'm crazy and I don't mean "omg you so crazy" no I mean "certified, Doctor's note, medicated bat shit nuts" I live everyday as an emotional wreck. Yup I'm a joy to live with I go from 0-60 in no time flat. Why does that make me lucky? Here's why

Steve in 05

In 2004 I moved to a new city to get a change, started a new place to work first day there I smelled and saw him (yes smelled and no not the eww shower way, the omg I wanna eat you up) took a year of being subtle about being interested, honestly he was way out of my league, plus he was seeing someone. Although that didn't last and it took me 8 months to figure that out. But when I did I decided being subtle wasn't working...not to mention the other girls who were after him. So I did what I had to do to get his attention, and it worked he was mine. we have always done things ass backwards, when we got together he was house sitting for family and I basically moved in day one. 3 months later he moved back to his parents and I mine.

Of course I didn't let him see the crazy right away, although I'm sure he suspected I wasn't normal, but I'm sure the kinky going at it like rabbits sex kept him blind to it for a while and I mean we were like rabbits every chance, every place we got naked if we weren't working we were getting freaky. I blame it on 21 years of being pent up haha (yes he was my first and I am proud of that) well that and I'm a freak.

Anyway, as time went on I was getting worse and things were getting well difficult. I was trying to keep it bottled up but it was getting worse. 2007 we got pregnant with our oldest, and oh man pregnancy hormones on top of being me was not pretty. We made it through, finally in 2010 after the birth of our son I realized I needed help that or I was afraid he would leave (he almost did at one point) here I am now few years later still not perfect, but I am getting better with my meds, and noticing the signs of an episode sooner things have been better.

Is our life perfect? hell no, do I wonder almost every day why he stays around and puts up with my crazy? of course I do, am I thankful for everyday that he is still here, you bet. there are times when I tell him to leave he deserves better than what he has to put up with on alot of days, although they are fewer and far between now. But still for him to put up with all this shit for 8 years that is what makes me the luckiest girl in the world.

our wedding day.